“Sex and the City 2”
Written and Directed by Michael Patrick King; inspired by the Book by Candice Bushnell and the Television Series, Created by Darren Star; Stars Sarah Jessica Parker, Kristin Davis Cynthia Nixon and Kim Cattrall. Story: Frustrated by their everyday lives that have fallen into a rut, the girls jump for a chance at an international road trip when Samantha’s work brings the opportunity.
Seen June 1st, by Guest Reviewer, Dana Scanlan
DANA:
Thanks to Lars and Adam for asking me to contribute to their blog. In the spirit of the brutal honesty they have fostered, I have a few things to say about Sex and the City 2…
The franchise seemed played out, the previews looked ridiculous, the buzz was all bad and still I went to see SATC 2, hopeful that it would exceed my (very low) expectations. Sadly, it was far worse than I could have imagined. After two hours and thirty minutes of stupid puns, (“He’s Lawrence of my Labia”), a weak story and blatantly unsympathetic characters, I found myself sprinting to the bar downstairs to drown my own sorrows in Cosmopolitans.
It usually follows that if a studio saturates the market with round the clock press just before the release of a movie, it’s a sure bomb and the studio is just trying to troubleshoot — hoping for a monster opening weekend before word of mouth kills it. Actor interviews leading up to the release were filled with all the same buzz words, “a romp” a “Hope and Crosby like road movie”, “it’s all about the fashion – Carrie, alone, has 49 outfits…” It was as if they were all reading from the same list of studio approved sound bytes. And, btw… a Hope and Crosby road movie? Seriously? If that’s how they are promoting this thing, who is the target demographic — my grandmother? Her grandmother? The press frenzy and desperation to make SATC 2 an EVENT should have been an indication that they were scrambling.
The story thread picks up two years after Carrie got everything she ever wanted… She married her uber-rich prince charming, Big, and should have sailed into the sunset to continue buying Manolo’s and boring her readers with her whiny musings on love and relationships in the big city. But now that she has everything, Carrie is still not happy. She wants to go out every night and pouts when her hard working husband wants to stay in, order take-out and cuddle a few nights a week. She fears that they are becoming a boring married couple and is aghast when Big installs a television in their bedroom — sure this marks the beginning of the end for her youth and status as a hip Manhattanite, with a great fashion sense. Carrie’s cohorts are equally restless: Miranda is stalling at work, feeling oppressed by a boss who doesn’t want to hear her opinions; Charlotte is overwhelmed raising a toddler and a five year old, despite having a full time nanny; and Samantha is trying to fight menopause with organic concoctions she is required to rub on her vagina twenty- four seven. And she does. In her office — which has glass walls.
When Samantha is invited to travel to Abu Dhabi to meet with a sheik about promoting it as THE up and coming resort destination, she suggests her three besties join her on the press tour. The “ladies” jump at the chance to get away and flee all their problems in New York. And thus, begins the “romp” portion of the movie. In Abu Dhabi, they are treated to fancy cars, world-class accommodations, personal butlers and camel rides in the dunes. They dine and drink champagne like royalty in beautiful tents constructed for their comfort, wearing outfits that become more and more insane as the trip progresses. But these ladies are tough – braving the heat and desert sands draped in many layers of clothing and sporting six-inch high heels – all in the name of fashion. Still Carrie worries about the freshness of her relationship with Big. And when she runs into old flame Aidan, she slathers on the kohl eyeliner and flirts up a storm, which results in a furtive kiss. Now Carrie has to decide if she should tell Big or keep the kiss to herself. Meanwhile, Samantha flaunts her sexuality, refusing to respect the customs of the Middle East. And Charlotte and Miranda bond over how difficult it is to be a mother.
The characters are all so desperate and lame; it’s hard to care about any of them. Samantha has become an over the top freak and all the women in general are far less confident, realistic and empowered than they are in the early years of the HBO series. Once iconic “types” who real women could relate to, the characters have morphed into weirdly unrelateable cartoon-like versions of themselves that no lavish, wedding featuring Liza Minnelli as officiator AND entertainment, Abu Dhabi karaoke version of “I Am Woman”, nor desperate race through a souk dressed in shrouds and veils can salvage.
